Baptism

I never knew I wanted to
Before I could speak
Before I knew hearing
There was a pitter patter
Of a thing that was different
To any I'd felt before

Different like that which
Came from my eyes and my pores
And the blood which courses
Thorugh my veins
A liquid, like ink
A marker, a stain

That would be called rain and that pain
And baptism some say
Still memory of all that and not the day
The day I first knew not of its name
Like long before art and before frame
Before different and before same

Not yet knowing what I did hear
Rustling, thunder, rain
Animals running
Sounds on my ear
Feelings then came
Later called fear

Before I could speak I heard sounds
Without knowing their name
Or what they were
Or from where they came
Before I learnt that I care
All even before one year

My self I protected after the pain
And before I could forget
I protected everything
Bound by a skin
Hiding or hidden
So much held within

To feel before knowing what is felt
Like pitter patter or howling wind
Through eyes, ears on skin
That was my baptism.